On Dating

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On Dating

Like a fish searching for water… 4/2008

Like a fish searching for water…

Like a fish swimming around searching for water, I’m realizing that no matter how hard I try or where I look I will never find love. I can’t ‘find’ love, I think, because it’s everywhere, everything, and everyone. I can let love into my life. I can experience love. I can bathe in it, but I’ll never look under a rock and say “Oh! There it is!”

And I’ll never be ‘get’ into a relationship, any more than I can “try” to go to sleep. I can act like I’m in a relationship – like a performer in a play I can choose a partner and recite the lines of relationship. I can say all the right things, buy the right flowers, live the right promises. A relationship, I believe, is a reflection of the energy or synergy between two people. Proclaiming that I want a relationship to be or look a certain way is like trying to argue with my own reflection: “That’s not what I look like!”

So I’m not going to sit here in front of this glowing screen and tell you that, if you show up and fit precisely into my box I’ll love you forever. Nor can I claim that I’m ‘ready’ to fall in love or be in relationship again. All I can do is suggest that we chat a little and, if it feels right we meet. If our hearts tend to want to open up as we sit across from one another drinking a cup of coffee, then we’ll sit a little longer.

“Show up, Pay Attention, Tell the Truth, and Don’t be Attached to Outcomes.” (from Angeles Arrien)

Me? I am a man who embraces paradox. I live on a golf course, but don’t play golf. I have website that supports caretakers of handicapped pets but I don’t have any animals. I run a business that supports companies in the renewable energy industry, yet I still tend to leave the bathroom light on when I leave the room. I am a Master Electrician trained in Reiki, a Microsoft Certified Professional that uses an iPhone, and a compassionate, romantic man who frequently needs alone-time.

I like thunderous waterfalls, forests that are nearly silent until you really listen, rushing through treetops on ziplines, formal cocktail parties, dinners where everyone laughs when someone burps, and I’ll eat (almost) anything except zucchini. My deepest unfulfilled fantasy is to make love in zero-gravity. I like to learn, explore, fix stuff, teach, and allow gratitude-energy to course through my meditations. I love to play, to touch, to massage, to neck, and have my back scratched for endless hours by long, sharp fingernails
You? I have no idea who or what you are. I’ve met the woman of the dreams, several times, and found that my dreams roam as clueless as my waking wanderings.

Want to play? Take my breath away! Send me photos that make me gasp. You turn heads when you walk into a room and your eyes and your smile will capture me. My sweetheart is a gorgeous, brilliant, self-assured, self-aware woman who loves her life and can enjoy every moment without needing me to be anything other than exactly what I am. .. at least I think she is.

Confused?

Good.

Personal Ad 3/2008

500 words and you’re mine! Imagine! All I have to do is type the right words in this little box and the woman of my dreams comes dancing (and laughing) into my life. It’s like magic! I know you’re out there because I can feel you reading this. In one paragraph you’ll recognize me. Another one and our hearts will connect through the realm where love lives. Then comes Spring.
Read more...

A Personal Ad 4/97

Relationship

I want to be with a woman who expects to find "wholeness" within herself. So many women expect to be made whole by a husband, possibly a family. A committed man will make her complete. I can't live up to those kinds of expectations. I can be with a woman, but not for a woman. I can provide support, encouragement, love, tenderness, courage, whatever is needed, but my partner is responsible for providing the person to support. Two half-persons don't make a whole… but two "wholes" in honest union, make a God.

A Blind Date

It would have been 'tacky' to ask, wouldn't it?

I swung my car into the Mid-Town garage at 6:30PM, relieved that I was going to be on time. I found a parking spot, about five floors up. My little red convertible, my "mid-life mobile" slid between a silver BMW and a white Volvo station wagon. This "blind date" had been the object of my intense anticipation for a week now. The thrill brought a flush to my face. I sat in my car for a moment, thinking of the women that I've met "on-line" in the past few months. Some were fascinating, and some not so fascinating. Each one, though, was an adventure in anticipation.

Dating in the 00's

At first, when two people begin ‘speaking’ on the internet, something quite curious happens. They often establish a connection, a bond that is often deeper then they would in person. They are completely safe in their anonymity. They are virtually unafraid and have no need to hide. Being that they came here because they wanted to want to 'fall in love', they are also ready to open their hearts. Fingers fly across keyboards as souls squeeze to fit themselves into empty white boxes on the screen.

Let me tell you who I am, let me read you, see you, breathe you. Type to me!

Must Love Dogs

A Little Background... A valentines day content on a dating site offered free radio time to the "Best Dating Story" winner. Notice all the shameless plugs for my website, HandicappedPets.com. Yes, I won.

Typically, when I get a “wink” with no photo attached, I ignore it. The box that says “Ask me for my photo” should conclude with “if you dare.” I liked the screen name, though “MirandaAndHerDog” so I looked at her profile. Sounded sweet, called herself pretty, slim, blond/blue. Said “Must love dogs” and I do. In fact, I’m the creator of a website for elderly, disabled, and special needs dogs called “HandicappedPets.com.” Figured that should be worth a few points.

… so I dared and clicked “Ask me for my photo.”

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